Face #7: Toddlers and Tiaras

About one year ago, as I was casually scrolling through my AMAZING Comcast TV show selections (you're welcome, Comcast. You give me money now?), I come to TLC'S AMAZING hit TV show Toddlers and Tiaras. After only watching one episode, and proceded to watch the ENTIRE SERIES on Netflix. 

Flash forward a year. I was in a musical called "All Shook Up", and my fellow castmates and I are talking about the new TV show "Here Comes Honey Boo Boo", a spin off of Toddlers and Tiaras and is about a redneck little girl who has taken the pagaent life by storm. We then got into a "face off" match of who can make the best Toddlers and Tiaras face. 

THIS, is mine:

OBVIOUSLY, I should have won. But apparentely somone else had more "creepy looking" eyes.

whatever.

Anyway, I feel that this proves that I am getting WAY more attractive by the hour and that boys should just want to make out with me all the time.

But I guess I am just TOO sexy and I intimidate them.

Or something.

(sobs violently) (forever alone) (cats)

Guest Face: Fatbooth!

 This is Erica! She's freaking awesome. We are also extremely similar. She also goes by Rick, Ricky, or Bacon. Just kidding .That's me.

 Speaking of me, this is me as a fat person. Yay.....

 Hey! Recognize her? This is Kenna. She has been a guest on here before. She said she didn't want a picture of her fat. But I put one on here anyway. :) Sorry KenKen!

 This is J. Also Jessica. But I call her J. She's pretty cool. She's like, INSANELY skinny. So boys, hit her up.

and Morgan.




JK Morg I heart you I wouldn't ignore your awesome fat booth picture.



So I'm thinking of starting a club called "Forever Alone Club" and Mr. Judy would be my faculty advisor (because let's be real he is NEVER going to get girlfriend let alone get married) and I would be the only member.


Also, I'm like the only one who didn't get asked to homecoming. But hey, bacon.

Face #6: Disgust Queen

How was everyone's summer? Adventurous? Warm? YOLO-like?

Not mine.

In my forever alone world, I worked, ate bad food, stayed out of the sun, did my online classes, and slept in.

As shown In the picture, my summer has been filled with attractive boys just begging to date me.

But that's because I've slept all summer and my dreams have been very nice.

School is starting up again.
So we can all die now.

Face #5: Nyyyaahhh

I'm not sure why anybody likes me.

I am so weird.....

YAY!

I'm working on my poem writing!
I call this one:
The Pietanic was hit by an Iceberg Lettuce.
Twinkle Twinkle I am Bored
How I wonder how to rhyme.

Am I getting any better?

My best description of this face would be

SEND ME TO AN INSANE ASYLUM

Guest Face: Kenna Vercillo

This is Kenna. She says she can make ugly faces, but if this is the ugliest she can do....

Eh.
I put it on anyway because I think she's pretty cool.

She has A LOT of money, and so she always has all the cutest clothes.

I hate her.

Just kidding.

But seriously.
I wrote a song about Kenna!!!
It's called KenKen the Super Sternum

KenKen is super
Superer than you.
She also has a sternum.
Sternumer than you.

I told you I can't right poems.

Prom! No Ugly Faces! (I think...)

PROMPROMPROM.
I went.
and didn't make as many gross faces as normal!!!!
:)
here are some pictures of my awesome group and awesome date!

this is my date Taylor and I.
I would be jealous of us.

My amazing group!
The Asian is one of my best friends, Madi Nagao. I love her and all her asianness.
Her date is Jake West. They are smokin', no?
Tony, the guy to my right, is in my math class.


I think.
And his date is Madi's cousin, Julianna.
She's in college.
In St. George.
Don't worry, I'm jealous too.
 In case your wondering, yes, they are blood related, even though Julianna isn't Asian.
 It confused Taylor.

My dress was HUGE. I loved it.

It was a good night. Great date. Great food.

And still all my awkwardness.

I pity any who cross my path.

Face #4: Sneeze-er-ew

These are not getting any better, are they?

I feel that these face captures the essence of all unhappiness.

This face was discovered when a friend and I were taking a picture, and I had to sneeze.

THEN it 'TWAS BORN!!!!!!!!

I honestly hope no one has actually seen this face. I DO hope I will eventually get a boyfriend. maybe. someday.

ah, screw it, I'm gonna be a cat lady.

P.S.
I went to prom!!!!! and none of my pictures were ugly!!!

YAY!!!

Face #3: Oh Dear....

There aren't many words to describe this face.
It's just.....

*shudder*

I try really hard not to make this face.

I discovered it in an ugly face contest I was competing in with a friend. (I obviously won)

It even makes ME feel uncomfortable. and that's REALLY hard to do. I'm like, the Chuck Norris* of feeling comfortable.

It's a mixture of a chipmunk, chin-face, snake-tongue, and a person having a seizure.

If I had to tell someone what makes this face pretty to save my life, I would have to say it would be the *DROPS DEAD*

*I'm sorry Chuck Norris. No one compares to you. I didn't mean it.

please don't hurt me....

Guest Face: Kaitlin Archibald

Kaitlin Archibald.

Friend.
Fellow Weirdo.
Awesome Person.

K ickin Personality
A wesome Singing Voice
I  nteresting Face
T otally Rad
L istens to Good Music*
I mpossibly Cool
N ever Rude**

Kaitlin and I have a lot in common.
Face contortion is a talent we both share.

But we also both love to sing.

Here is a picture of Kaitlin and I. It describes us pretty perfectly.

Although the above face is contorted and, I must say, AWESOME, she is actually super pretty..... so......

jealousy.

An anagram for Kaitlin Is Awesome is Toenail Same Kiwi.

So, that pretty much says it all.

*I actually have no idea. I just assumed.
**SO NOT TRUE.

Face #2: I'm Upset (and Really Creepy)

Ah. Beautiful, amiright?

Although this face is one of my more uncommon ones, it is still just as ugly as the rest of them.

See how my chin crinkles in places that remind you of all the terrible feeling you have ever felt!!!
I may give you this face to make you feel so repulsed you'll do whatever I ask.

It may sound crazy, but people don't really like this face, and when I need something done, I need something done.

Note: The extreme amounts of makeup on my face are not because I am a prostitute but because I was in a musical at my high school. Yes. MUSICAL. Conformation that I am indeed, a freak.

Stay tuned for the Guest Face of the Week!!!

Face #1 (The Chin(s))

Attractive. I know.
If I give you this face, I am most likely excited.
Here is a haiku for this face.

The face with the chins
might give you quite a startle
I can't write poems

This is one of my more common faces. I pull it on anyone and everyone. I like to give a message of
PREPARE TO FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE
i may give it to you for just a moment, but, if you're lucky, I can last up to several minutes of uninterrupted eye contact goodness.

The Beginning of Something Awful.

Hello!!! Welcome to this blog. If you are looking for an attractive person, leave. If you are looking for something profound or heart wrenching, leave. This is for all those who want to waste time!!!!!

Because those are my favorite people.

Anyways, I would like all of you to know I am a woman of many (disturbing) faces. So I will display them for you here! And, every week, we will have a GUEST FACE!!!!!!!

So all you potential forever single people, send me your face, because it may be ugly enough to put on the internet!!!!

YAY!!!!!!